Our lives revolve around the idea of happiness. But, to each of us, it may mean something different. So what is it that we are really searching for? And are we basing it on external circumstances? In this simple and profound Ted Talk, Buddhist nun Gen Kelsang Nyema tells us what we know already, but refuse to reconcile: that the gift of happiness is truly inside the mind and the soul, reports The Indian Express.

She begins by asking three important questions: Are we having a good day? Why are we having a good/bad day? Would we rather have a good or bad tomorrow? We, obviously, cannot answer the third question because we are always yearning to have good experiences. But, are we outsourcing our feelings?

“If we really wish to have a good day every day, we have got two things we need to do. We need to stop outsourcing our happiness and unhappiness on people and circumstances. In other words, we need to stop attributing our happiness to what’s going on externally, and we need to stop blaming others for our unhappiness. Our second job, is to actively cultivate a source of peace and a source of happiness coming from inside our own mind,” Nyema says.

“Happiness and unhappiness are states of mind, and, therefore, their real causes cannot be found outside the mind,” she says, while quoting a line from one of her teacher’s books. “If we have a peaceful state of mind, we will be happy regardless of people and circumstances. If our mind is un-peaceful or agitated, then even if we have very good circumstances, we’ll find it impossible to be happy.”